Archive for April, 2005

EXEGESIS

Saturday, April 30th, 2005

matt made an interesting point that i want to go ahead and highlight. this is not intended as one long, cruel joke against fat girls or ugly girls. this is an affirmation of a prevalent behavior that certain girls adhere to. it’s a form of whoring for attention by presenting oneself in a false light. [...]

The Top Ten Ways To Feel Bette About Yourself

Friday, April 29th, 2005

today’s friday top ten is brought to you by this “homeboy so ugly he forces cameras out of focus” portrait:

The Top Ten Ways To Feel Better About Yourself

10) play with a small animal – our bodies have these magic little beads of happiness in them, it’s called endorphins, or pheremones, or seratonin, or whatever—i didn’t [...]

COLLOQUIUM

Thursday, April 28th, 2005

everybody laugh at the boy with a stump for an arm!!!! HAHA!
tonight was the communication honors colloquium, i handed out my FOUR HUNDRED DOLLAR portfolios the other night, so tonight when my name was announced to present my project, i simply thanked my advisor and reiterated what i said the other night. later, i fielded [...]

TACIT

Wednesday, April 27th, 2005

today officially marks the start of my final week ever as a student. that has a nice ring to it, i think. final. it feels so definitive. today i want to take take a break from all things me to focus on something new. i’m not sure exactly what i want to discuss, but hopefully [...]

JUNTA

Tuesday, April 26th, 2005

while i was home for the weekend, i took the opportunity to meet my father for dinner one evening. we had mongolian food, and almost as soon as we sat down he looked at me and asked, “so do you have any plans for when you come home, or are you going to be a [...]

PERFORCE

Monday, April 25th, 2005

so the time has come to face up to the fact that i’m out four-hundred dollars—this is almost the cost of a college credit during summer session. to an unemployed, soon-to-be college graduate, this is a huge sum of money. it could be a month’s rent if i loved in a cozy little nook down [...]

FINIS

Saturday, April 23rd, 2005

my “published” writing portfolio for the honors colloquium has been completed.
pages = 30
chapters = 8
words = 8,794
instances of the “seven dirty words” = 6
illustrations = 3 (thank you dan, kate m and kate a)
hours spent editing friday/saturday = 18
typos found after final printing = 7 (d’oh)
kinko’s employees hit-on to ensure quick, reliable service: 1
total cost [...]