Loading ...Product Review: Santa Monica
By Evan ~ August 22nd, 2007. Filed under: review.
One of the best things about living in Los Angeles is that I’m a short drive away from Santa Monica.
“What’s so good about Santa Monica,” you ask?
Well, allow me to answer that query for you. First of all there’s Father’s Office, a great bar that offers Rogue, Avery, and all the best west coast breweries on tap. They also make the world’s best sweet potato fries. Sure they don’t let you use ketchup on the fries, and you can’t make any substitutions, additions or subtractions to anything on the menu (what you see is what you get), but their grub is really good. There’s always a line out the door. Secondly, there is a veritable bounty of beautiful young girls walking the streets, fresh out of college and struggling to comes to terms with their place in the world. They all possess this wide-eyed expression of sheer wonder, and although they might not show it, they’re all waiting to be swept off their feet if an opportunistic man comes along at the right time. Unfortunately for a man like me, the gentlemen that Santa Monica girls prefer tends to be either employed or independently wealthy.
Perhaps the greatest aspect of Santa Monica is its beautiful, golden beches. From any spot along the 3.5 miles of broad, sandy coastline, one can watch the Pacific Ocean spread out like a plume, creating a ceaseless expanse where sea is indistinguishable from sky. Census data indicates 84,084 people make their home here, and I’m sure the overwhelming majority choose Santa Monica because it affords them the chance to walk along the beches and feel the warm sand between their toes. After all, nothing beats strolling hand-in-hand down the beches with a loved one, building sand castles, gawking at girls in thongs, and tanning. According to the city’s website, Santa Monica considers itself to be the perfect setting for the California lifestyle, and the beches are a favorite destination for people of all ages. So come on down and enjoy the beches in Santa Monica. Just make sure you leave the beches before your day-long parking pass expires, and remember to always “display face up on dash”.
I was satisfied with this parking lot, and did not mind that my $7.00 was only for use of the parking space. I had a fun day at the beches, and there was no “loss or damage to vehicle or contents” that I could complain about. I grade the beches of Santa Monica sixteen yellow Labrador retrievers, which is somewhere between the Wegmans soup/sandwich combo (rated four lavender bananas) and the “Happy Birthday Mom” card (rated eleven elven ears, aka 6,000 exploding stars).
PS – Rent is due next week. Buy something, will ya?
