Last week at a Society for Psychical Research study, Robert McLuhan delivered a speech about the psychology of “the skeptics,” or those who are hesitant to believe (or flat-out disagree) with “the believers” on issues such as paranormal occurrences, extra-terrestrial contact, 2012, and a host of other hilariously off-beat issues. A transcription of his talk can be found at this website. I feel it is my duty to dissect the speech because not only am I skeptical of parapsychology and paranormal behaviors, I’m skeptical of pretty much everything and everyone. I’m skeptical about people who vote certain ways, I’m skeptical about the fast food I ate last night, and I’m skeptical about finding a record worthy of the title “Best Album of 2008″ before the end of the year. Since Mr. McLuhan promises an inside look at the mind of a skeptic, I figure…why not give the guy a chance to analyze me? Maybe I’ll learn a thing or two about myself. Actually, I think that’s pretty doubtful. I’m not convinced this guy has what it takes to get inside my head. I’ll probably just end up making a series really cynical statements, scoffing at the guy, or flat-out dismissing his work as “retarded”.

Great. This guy’s first sentence is a full paragraph in length, and he opened with the grammatically incorrect, “When I first got interested”. I’m already feeling skeptical, and I don’t think McLuhan is going to achieve what I flippantly assumed he probably wanted to achieve by giving this lecture. Nevertheless, I’m going to continue reading past the first sentence, because everybody deserves a second chance (except for psycho ex-girlfriends, deadbeat fathers, and The Decemberists, The Shins, and sundry other hacks).

Unfortunately for McLuhan, he takes all the one-offs and throwaway insults that are so often heaped upon “believers” and simply turns them around on “skeptics”. This is his entire response. He quotes Harry Houdini, he quotes Carl Sagan, he quotes a number of folks who dismiss parapsychology, and then generalizes that those of us who do not believe in paranormal activity are nervous, anxious, fearful, and closed-minded. He writes, “Speaking for myself, the idea that some paranormal phenomena might be real intrigues me - I want to know more. I dares ay most of you feel the same way. We can be objective about it. But over the years I have come to realize that some people don’t think like that at all. They find the idea of telepathy, just to take one category, to be deeply worrying - it seems like the ultimate violation of privacy.” In other words, the “believers” are the good guys; they are open to new ideas and greater understanding of our universe and our minds. The non-believers are the bad guys, frightened of change and riddled with anxiety when it comes to shaking up their core beliefs. It’s almost as if McLuhan is taking pity on me for not believing that this is an actual UFO sighting, when in reality I just don’t believe in telepathy.

In sixth grade I had to do a project as part of my middle school’s Gifted And Talented program. The objective was to find twelve people and test their telepathic abilities. I was instructed to sit them down in a quiet room, let them know that I would be thinking of a random number between one and fifty, and that they should try to hone in on the number I was sending them through my thoughts. Each person interviewed had fifty guesses at fifty numbers. The results, as you might expect, were amazingly low. I think the most anybody got correct was two numbers, and I’m sure that falls well within some established range of “chance” as defined by scientific research by scientists who have way more numbers and tests at their disposal than a sixth grader. That makes me a skeptic, but I’m pretty sure I’m not a crotchety old fart afraid of having my world shattered by a startling new revelation about the human brain’s ability to communicate ideas through non-verbal or physical means.

To that end, I don’t experience any cognitive dissonance when presented with data that contrasts my own beliefs. I naturally deny things like the myth of 2012 because they’re derived from vague theories — made in hindsight — about ancient mysteries that date all the way back to 200CE. I am the type of person who would rather use common sense than lend credence to a practically universal unknown. That is not to say that people who believe a cataclysmic event is going to occur in the next four years have no common sense, I’m just stating that I think it’s easier for me to believe in a future that is not dictated by an 1,800 year old calendar created by a civilization that was very good at math. Of course, Asians are also good at math, and they’re ardent supports of a 2012 apocalypse.

McLuhan also demonstrates his point about skeptics being ardent non-believers and pessimists by recounting how the Wright brothers were mocked when they tried to show that human flight was possible in a heavier-than-air vehicles. He also states, “In 1879 Thomas Edison invented the incandescent electric light, but could not convince the scientific establishment that he had succeeded, even after he had rigged up a public demonstration.” This The Secret style of bait-and-switch logic is intended to draw a parallel between famous scientific minds and parapsychology, when it says literally nothing about the psychology of a non-believer. In The Secret audiences are lead to believe that Buddha, Carl Jung, Aristotle and and Isaac Newton as “past secret teachers” while giving absolutely no hard evidence that they believed in such an idea. McLuhan drops the names of Thomas Edison and the Wright brothers not-so-subtly as if to say they are peers of the “believers,” and not simply random historical figures who changed the world. Just because Wilber Wright and his brother Orville proved fearful and cynical critics to be wrong in regard to human flight doesn’t mean I’m going to be proven wrong for standing in opposition to parapsychology.

Although I am a self-proclaimed skeptic, I continue to read news stories related to parapsychology because I find them interesting. Mine is not a morbid or sick fascination, but a general interest in what issues scientists (and some quacks) are tackling these days. I consider it part of my regular daily or weekly information intake. Still, I don’t think my cynicism or disbelief will change until I’m faced with a situation where simple logic demands it. The discovery of hard and true evidence can make believers out of anyone. It happened with the Wright Brothers and Thomas Edison. At some point, those skeptics forgot about their bias or their fear of change, and so too will modern skeptics if a scientist in field of parapsychology makes another life-changing revelation. Oh, and if the world does indeed end on December 21st, 2012, you can taunt me posthumously with a series of I-told-you-sos…but I wouldn’t count on it.

PS - I’ve also decided that, from now on, when a person tries to sell me of a completely irrational idea I’m going to call them out as a “peddler of woo woo”! Oh my God, that is fucking amazing!

PPS - I fixed the forced registration for people who desire to leave comments on this page, but if you’re a frequent reader I’d rather you sign up for a user account because someday that will earn you a special prize (wink wink!). Somehow Neill figured out the solution to user avatars, but I haven’t, so maybe he’ll leave a comment describing how to upload an avatar for yourself if you are a Swan Fungus registered user.

Superdrag - Wrong vs. Right Doesn’t Matter
James Blackshaw - O True Believers
K.M. Krebs - I Came To Scoff But Stayed To Pray
Lizzy Mercier Descloux - Mission Impossible
Scout Niblett - I Am
The Monks - Cuckoo
Parts & Labor - Stay Afraid

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