• Hey unemployed kids, CNN and CareerBuilder have put together yet another informative job market-related article for your enjoyment. Did you know that at least 13 companies are hiring right now, even though we’re in a depression! It’s true! Would you like to know which company leads off this amazing list? Because I’m going to spoil it for you anyway. It’s 7-11. Ha! Way to generate enough interest for me to read through the rest of the article, CNN/CareerBuilder. Like I care about the other 12 companies when the company important enough to rank number one on your list is fucking 7-11. How demeaning is that? I have an idea, why doesn’t CNN lay off whoever came up with the idea to partner with CareerBuilder. The dynamic journalistic duo has done nothing but craft horrible articles ever since they joined [meager] forces. [<a href=" alt="" />story]

• You have probably read this already, but Daily Mail UK published an article this week stating that too much coffee increases the risk of hallucinating. I must have seen links to this article on four different websites, and then Jack e-mailed it to me for inclusion in my weekly world (w)news update. So, I’m not a coffee drinker, but if you drink more than seven cups of coffee a day you’re more likely to hear or see things that are not there. In my opinion, if you’re drinking more than seven cups of coffee a day you should probably just switch to blow. Plenty of people can still be productive drug addicts. Maybe you’re one of them. [story]

• If cocaine isn’t your anti-drug, I suggest you try The Ganzfeld Procedure. Apparently you can hallucinate on your lunch break! Here’s how: “Begin by turning the radio to a station playing static. Then lie down on the couch and tape a pair of halved ping-pong balls over your eyes. Within minutes, you should begin to experience a bizarre set of sensory distortions. Some people see horses prancing in the clouds, or hear the voice of a dead relative. It turns out that the mind is addicted to sensation, so that when there’s little to sense — that’s the purpose of the ping-pong balls and static — your brain ends up inventing its own.” Wild, huh? [story]

• Oh, and by the way, “Our world may be a giant hologram”. Wow…what a downer. [story]

• Apparently there’s a new toy on the market that lets you “test and hone your Jedi-like abilities.” It’s called a Force Trainer, and it “comes with a headset that uses brain waves to allow players to manipulate a sphere within a clear 10-inch-tall training tower.” I don’t understand how it works, but if it keeps kids from playing with each other in the streets after school, I’m all for it. That way, when they become teenagers they’ll all join World Of Warcraft or MySpace and totally forget how to interact with one another. Who needs friends when you can just be anti-social and play in your own head all the time! The future of humankind is pathetic. [story]

• Everybody and their Facebook has already reported “the best job in the world,” so I’m probably not telling you something you don’t already know. [story]

Tangerine Dream – Zeit
Khanate – Skin Coat
Currituck Co. – Sleepwalking I
Otomo Yoshihide – Mushroom

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