Last night was a complete shit-show. Everyone ventured out to the areas bars and had a really good time becoming very, very intoxicated. I probably should not have consumed as much alcohol as I did knowing I had a doctor’s appointment today, but I don’t let trifles like medicine and doctors stand in the way of me getting totally fucked up. So I woke up with the tiniest of tiny hangovers and was completely straightened out by noon. Then I drove over to a new doctor’s office in Glendale. He seemed like a nice guy, nerdy but friendly and comforting. The good news is he doesn’t think I’m bleeding internally or in danger of having any of my vital organs quit on me. The bad news is I didn’t get a diagnosis and now have yet another prescribed medication I have to take for my stomach. I think that raises the total number to three. Wait a minute — isn’t this kind of the same reason Kurt Cobain turned to heroin?
I drove over to Nicci’s to say hi and watch an episode of Breaking Bad (come May 24th I will officially hail it the greatest show on television — until then, it’s all LOST). Then I headed to Burbank to visit Nate at work and participate in our annual fantasy baseball draft. Last year I made it to the semi-finals and just missed out on the $500 prize. I felt good about my chances going into this year’s draft. At the end of the night, I was pissed off at myself for some stupid moves. I don’t know if any of you losers play fantasy baseball, but I’m in a 12-team league, auction style draft, with a $260 “salary cap”. Usually in auctions I like to stay conservative at the start and buy up a lot of mid-price guys in the middle rounds, leaving myself a ton of money at the end in case people slip through the cracks. This year I played it too conservative and still had $46 left over at the end of the draft. What that means is that I could have drafted Hanley Ramirez for $50 and had him on my roster instead of Mark DeRosa, who I purchased for $4 because I was being dumb and trying to bid him up so someone else would overpay for him. Oh well. Here’s my opening day lineup. If anything, I went for guys with solid hitting credentials (high avg, above average power) and young pitchers with good upside. I think it’s a positive sign that only one of my starting batters hit lower than .270 last season. I expect solid results from Scott Kazmir on his new team and Rick Porcello in his second season. I also wound up with five closers on my roster, which is completely the opposite of how I normally draft. I hate drafting closers. Now I have five. Shit. Fee free to analyze and predict how my team will fare this year.
And, by the way, Nate’s office has the coolest work environment I’ve ever seen. It’s like a mini-Google or something. I want a job there.
C Matt Wieters 5
1B Adrian Gonzalez 15
2B Jose Lopez 15
3B Aramis Ramirez 20
SS Erick Aybar 2
OF Nick Markakis 20
OF Kyle Blanks 3
OF Rajai Davis 4
UTIL Joey Votto 24
SP Felix Hernandez 20
SP Scott Kazmir 11
SP David Price 9
P Rick Porcello 12
P Leo Nunez 6
P Rafael Soriano 10
RP Carlos Marmol 9
RP Brian Fuentes 9
RP Octavio Dotel 5
BE Brian Matusz 2
BE Mark Buehrle 1
BE Kevin Slowey 2
BE Alcides Escobar 2
BE Cody Ross 2
BE Mark DeRosa 4
BE Bengie Molina 2
Total: 214
Remaining: 46
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