This Wait Is A Gift
A reader not-so-subtly told me that I should be building my mix tapes into an app called Spotify and embedding the playlists in these posts because it will help my “influence” on social media or something? While there are certainly benefits to…you know…trying to grow the Swan Fungus name, I don’t think this playlist idea is the best way to do so. For starters, I’d be beholden to whatever songs Spotify has in its database. Does it have the entire Two: Dot discography? What about the Mark Heyes record? How long do I have to wait for the new Russian Circles record or Jenny Hval record to appear? Is Todd even on there? How do I get Todd on there!?
Maybe this is why there are still several boxes of unsold Todd record sitting in my closet. He’s not on Spotify, guys.
I’ve been blogging for over a decade now and somehow during that span the technology has surpassed me. Do people even listen to music on their computers anymore? Macs don’t even have CD drives anymore!
Sorry, where was I? Oh, right. The playlist thing.
I think I still have, what…four or five regular readers who visit this website? What would be the easiest way for you to enjoy the music I share here? Do you like the current system of hosting files for one week that you can save for later or discard at your leisure, legally grey though it may be? Would you prefer a playlist-style format you could stream or follow or whatever it is Spotify allows you do with playlists? How about Soundcloud? That’s a thing, right? Is there an alternative I’ve not yet considered because I don’t know it exists? Help me out, readers! In the words of the immortal songwriter Clay Aiken, “I am nothing without you / Just a shadow passing through.”
My point is…bear with me while I try to adapt to the current music streaming/downloading technology. What little music I share right now will come back threefold in time — like an old gypsy woman’s curse! There’s a stack of records waiting for me to digitize them. There’s even a couple old porn-y ones like, “Confessions Of A Nymphomaniac” that look like they came off the backs of old porn-y cereal boxes. Because porn-sponsored cereal used to be a thing, right? You know, like Creampie Of Wheat? Or Count Cockula? Cap’n Munch? Oh well. If only there was a cereal whose name rhymed with gangbang. This post would have been published twenty minutes ago.
My point is, there’s a whole backlog of weird records I need to share with you. Maybe some combination of Spotify for Mix Tapes and direct downloads for unique discoveries is the way to go. At the very least, you should feel good about the fact that I’m inspired enough to even consider these options. In the past I’d just run and hide for a few months and let the cobwebs grow over this site. Have I used enough metaphors in this post yet? How about porn puns?
No no no. It’s okay, I’ll show myself out. But first! Here’s a weird, private….loner…metal (?) 45. Good luck finding this one on Spotify.
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